When you least expect it
by superstrawberryness
Summary: They have been arguing more and more lately. Little things about Remus just get on Sirius’s nerves. Sirius’s attitude grates on Remus. And yet… it’s less like an argument somehow. Somehow it’s more like a dance." SB/RL LE/JP


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When you least expect it.

Rated M mainly for very strong language. Sorry for any inconsistencies, plot holes, spelling/gramatical errors or factual errors that i have missed. I realise the timings may be different (e.g. what year they became animagi etc.) but please go with it for the sake of artistic license.

**_I don't own the characters or "Harry Potter" series._ **

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**1st year**

They meet for the first time on the train. It's funny how the random selection of a train compartment can sometimes determine your friendships. Sirius Black is first to enter. He wants somewhere empty, somewhere alone. He can still hear his mother's disapproval ringing in his ears and is starting to feel sick already. He takes a seat by the window and closes his eyes. But soon enough he hears the compartment open, and sighing, he opens them again. Standing there is an strange-looking boy, with bags under his eyes and scuffs in the knees of his jeans. Sirius nods a greeting, and the boy gives a weak smile.

"Sirius." Says Sirius, deliberately leaving out his last name.

"Remus Lupin." Says the boy. They look at each other and sense a certain familiarity which, at this moment, means nothing to them.

The door slides open, and there is now a third boy in the compartment.

"Hey guys!" He says excitedly "I'm Peter Pettigrew. Hope you don't mind if I join you, only I don't know anyone and everywhere is full."

Peter has the air of a boy who always tries just a little bit too hard.

"That's fine." Remus says calmly. "I'm Remus, and this is Sirius."

Sirius feels odd. Normally he would hate for someone to introduce him like that. Sirius likes to speak for himself. But for some reason he lets Remus talk for him, and for some reason he doesn't mind.

James Potter is running late. He'd left the majority of his packing until the morning and there was a mad rush to get to the station on time. Saying goodbye to all his family had taken forever as well, as they had all insisted on coming with him to see him off, even his Aunty who he's only ever met once before. James feels like liquid sunshine is running through his veins this morning. He loves new challenges, new experiences…new people. However he's so late that most of the compartments are taken up already. Eventually he gets to one with only three people in, and slides the door open.

"Hi lads." He says, all confidence and mussed up hair. "James Potter."

* * *

Remus Lupin has been slipping away from time to time. At first the excuses are easy: extra tuition, a short visit to see some made-up relative, a detention. But evenings with the marauders are not a time to sneakily slip away on one's own. Like the shrewd creatures they are they will, inevitably, notice. And notice they have…

"Where are you off too this time, Lupin?"

"Library?"

"Private study session?"

"Choir practice?"

"An evening ramble?"

Remus mainly ignores them. It isn't as though they would understand. Friends, no matter how tolerant or sympathetic they seem, usually draw the line when he mentions the word "Werewolf". Not that he does. The very sound of it makes little hairs stand up on the back of his neck…His Monster Within.

"My mother's ill." He offers, rather pathetically.

"Right." smirks Sirius

"Great." says James

"Whatever." Peter snorts, subtle as usual.

Remus just stands there with a horrible aching feeling in his stomach and tries to conjure up the energy to think of a realistic lie. He finds to his dismay that has nothing left.

When the portrait door swings shut behind him James turns to his partner in crime.

"Girlfriend." He suggests

"No chance." Retorts Sirius. "He can't even talk to a girl without stuttering."

"A secret liaison with a teacher?"

"Don't be gay."

"Maybe _he _is." James grins. "Maybe he has little gay outings." Sirius just snorts at this. Peter, who has offered up nothing, is sat looking out of the common-room window, a strange look on his face.

"Guys? Have you ever noticed that Remus has a little gay outing precisely once a month?"

"Yeah." Says James, not wanting to be outwitted by Peter. "Any thicko could have figured that one out Pete."

"So have you ever noticed anything…significant about those nights he goes out?"

"Yes" Says Sirius, who has been looking vaguely annoyed but perks up slightly by Peter's words. "I think I know what you're on too." he bites his lip.

"Well, is someone planning on telling _me_?" James asks, irritated.

"Oh, for God's sake Potter. It's the bloody moon." Sirius snaps. He'd been thinking about this for some time now. Every month, on those nights where there was an absence of his thin, world-weary friend, he'd wait up. Remus wouldn't come back. His bed would lay made and empty all night, with the cold white light of the full moon shining down on it. Sirius had tried not to think about it.

James continues to look blank.

"Remus Lupin," Peter announces dramatically, " Is _a werewolf." _

* * *

Remus wakes the next morning under crisp white sheets. He can hear the familiar patter of Madam Pomfrey bustling about with some potion or other, medicating the sick and verbally harassing visitors. A groan emits itself from his lips. His face stings, and stomach aches in a way that he knows is not only physical. It's this terrible weight…this terrible, awful weight on his shoulders.

It's at breakfast when he knows he has blown it. They barely glance at him. James starts to ask how his mother is but Sirius gives him a_ look, _and he stops. The rest of the meal passes in near-silence. A marauder record.

Sirius confronts him at lunchtime. Remus is sat at the edge of the lake, watching the layer of fog roll over it. A duck swims peacefully, until it is enveloped by a large tentacle. He sighs.

"Why aren't you in the hall?" Says a voice behind him.

"Why aren't you?"

"Probably the same reason you aren't. Awkward silence?"

"Yeah."

Sirius sits down beside him.

"We know."

"I know you do."

"We don't care."

"Of course you do."

There are tears in Remus' eyes now, and he _can't _let Sirius see. He desperately tries to fight them off, and to stop his voice being all strangled and incredibly pathetic.

"Of course you do, Sirius. I'm a werewolf! This isn't some joke!"

"I'm not saying it is." Says Sirius. "But we don't care. We just don't. " There is a silence, in which Sirius pats him on the back .

"If you still want us, we're here."

And with that he walks away.

2nd year

It seems they spend most of their time in detention nowadays. Sirius is sat, legs stretched out in front of him, caught in the sunbeam from the window. Remus is writing his lines. Line after line in his perfect handwriting.

"You know…." Says Sirius, "It wouldn't hurt you to loosen up a bit."

"I am loose." Remus replies, concentrating. Sirius snorts.

"You are not loose! You're all… uptight." Remus is starting to get a bit offended, and stops writing.

"I'm just as loose as you, Sirius."

"Yeah, right."

" I am!"

"Prove it." Says Sirius, a small smile playing on his lips. Something about that smile is making Remus's breath quicken.

"Fine." He says. "But I will do it when you least expect it. Otherwise you will… sabotage the attempt."

"I look forward to it Remus, I look forward to it."

**3****rd**** Year. **

A stupid moment occurs one quiet Thursday evening.

They are sat together, just him and Sirius, chatting and joking and laughing.

"No I don't get it" Sirius is saying: "I really don't get why James can't just go up to Lily and tell her that he's like in love with her and wants to have her babies."

"Uh, probably because she'd run a mile"

"Imagine James's babies, though.."

"They'd all have messy hair and glasses."

"They'd all be arrogant wankers!"

They laugh, and at that moment the portrait door swings open and in comes Hannah. Hannah is in the year above and she's one of those girls who seems to get all the good luck. She has copious amounts of light blonde hair, good grades, perfect skin and white even teeth. Sirius immediately stops paying attention to Remus and instead focuses on Hannah and Hannah alone.

"She is _amazing_." He says in a low tone. Remus can't work out whether Sirius is talking to himself.

"She's alright." He mutters. For some reason his good mood has melted away. Instead he's filled with a feeling he can't place, although it's defiantly one he's had before…

Sirius is looking at him in a funny way.

"You like her, don't you?" He smirks and gives Remus a little nudge.

"What? No!" Remus angrily says. He gets up suddenly. "I'm going to bed, I have a headache."

Sirius is left frowning to himself. It seems very clear to him that Remus must have a bit of a thing for Hannah.

* * *

Sirius manages to corner her after a charms lesson.

"Do you fancy Remus?" He asks. There is really no point in beating about the bush.

Hannah is looking confused, and slightly embarrassed.

"Sirius, you're not making any sense" She blushes. "Why would I fancy Remus? I mean… I don't even know him."

"But, well… don't you find him, you know, don't you think he's…" Sirius flusters. This is turning out to be a lot more difficult than he'd originally thought.

"Do I think he's fit?" Hannah offers.

"Um, yeah" Says Sirius. She sighs.

"No, Sirius, I don't." she looks at her watch. " Look is there any point to this? I'm kind of busy."

"No. No there wasn't."

"Right." and she walks off quickly, leaving Sirius confused.

How could Hannah think Remus was unattractive? Surely he would have noticed if his friend had fallen out of the ugly tree and hit several branches on the way down….

**4****th**** year**

Sirius has never had to try in lessons. It' always come so naturally to him. Without trying he can keep up with a class, and if he wants too he can easily excel them. This is why it comes as much of a surprise to Sirius when Professor Epithelit calls him over after an uneventful Herbology lesson.

"Sirius," starts the young teacher, after sitting him down and getting him a cup of tea. "I, uh, don't know how to say this… is everything alright?"

"Sorry?"

She looks embarrassed.

"It seems your grades are falling. Rather spectacularly falling, actually. And I've had a word with some of your other teachers and they agree. You are bit preoccupied recently."

"Oh." Says Sirius. "I hadn't noticed."

"That's exactly what I'm talking about." She takes a sip of tea. "Sirius, it only seems to have happened in lessons when you are with your friends."

"Oh."

"And one friend in particular… maybe?

"What, James?" The two of them often play up in lessons, but it's usually only a bit of laddish banter and it isn't like they need to pay too close attention to get good grades.

"Ah, I see." She sighs, and drains her tea. "Odd boy, that Remus Lupin."

"Excuse me Professor?"

"Oh call me Suze."

"Uh, ok…I don't really see where you're going with this, Suze."

"I wont spell it out for you Sirius. You need to work it out for yourself. But you might want to consider why you spend half the lesson gazing at Lupin's hair, lovely as I'm sure it is." She gives him a wink and leaves him alone.

Sirius spends considerable time forcefully not thinking about what she has just said.

* * *

**4****th**** year. **

Remus Lupin is attempting to study, but finding this increasingly difficult. Lily Evans is sat opposite and keeps staring at him. He can see her out of the corner of his eye.

"Lily." He says, not looking up. She jumps.

"What?"

"Quit staring."

"I wasn't staring."

"Yes, you were. Now stop it."

The words come out sounding a bit more harsh than he had expected, and he quickly apologises. "It's just that I'm late for Marau- well, I'm late and I should have done this essay a week ago."

"It's ok," Lily smiles, flashing her shiny teeth at him. There is a gap between the front two, and Remus finds this quite endearing. Lily Evans showing a sign of imperfection…who would have thought it?

"Now you're staring." Says Lily.

"That I am."

They carry on in silence for a few moments, then Lily says:

"Does Potter fancy me?" and blushes crimson along the same line her freckles follow.

"Yes." Remus says plainly. He doesn't see much point in trying to hide the situation, as it has been blindingly obvious ever since James had hexed Simon Weatherby for looking up Lily's skirt in Charms.

"Hmm, I thought as much." Lily muses, still an impressive shade of scarlet. "It became blindingly obvious when he hexed Simon Weatherby for picking up my pencil in Charms." It seems she shakes herself slightly, and focuses back on Remus. "Aren't you late for something?"

* * *

James Potter is getting annoyed.

"Do you know what night this, Peter?" He asks his bored, chubby friend sitting by the fire.

"It's Thursday night, James."

"That it is. Do you know what time it is, Peter?"

"It's half past 6, James."

"And what do we do, invariably, on a Thursday night at 6 'o' clock, Peter?"

"Marauder prank planning hour, James."

Peter is spared further interrogation by the, albeit late, arrival of Sirius Black through the portrait door.

"I am late." Sirius announces. This seems to be a statement bizarrely directed entirely at himself.

"That you are." Says James, who is sat in an armchair looking decidedly _not_ at Sirius.

"Uh.. What have I missed?" Says Sirius, slightly unnerved.

"James talking in questions and three word sentences?" Peter offers.

James continues to say nothing, and proceeds in doing this when Remus arrives, five minutes later.

"James," Sirius explains, "is in a sulk."

"Ah. Well this might cheer you up. Guess who I have just been talking too?"

"I don't know." Says James, "Was it your arsehole?"

"That doesn't even make sense." Sirius points out.

"Evans." Finishes a smug Remus. James looks up, suddenly animated.

"Tell. Me. Everything." He says.

* * *

It's a warm Friday evening, and Sirius is sat at the top of the astronomy tower, having a fag with Remus. Not that Remus is smoking. He doesn't see the point in it. All that money and effort and cravings… and for what?

Sirius just wants something to do with his hands. They hang down like dead weights and make him feel useless. It's not the nicotine that he craves, but that repetitive motion, the putting in it and taking it out, the way he holds it between his fingers. Sirius is detail orientated. Remus is logical to a fault. Sometimes Remus thinks that together him and Sirius could make up one practically normal person.

"You know…" Starts Remus, "I think it could work."

"What?" Says Sirius, his eyes fixed on the pink hues of the horizon.

"Lily and James."

Sirius snorts, and spits up over the battlements below.

"That's vile, Sirius."

"You love it."

"I clearly don't."

Sirius sighs and rolls his eyes.

"I'm still waiting, Lupin."

"For what?"

"For you to surprise me. Like you said."

The dwindling light plays across Remus's face, and for a moment it looks like he's smiling.

"I think James is in love with her." He tells Sirius.

"Bollocks. He just wants a quick shag."

Remus frowns.

"You're such a tosser Sirius."

"What the fuck is your problem?" Sirius says, ruffled.

"Nothing."

"You actually have a problem"

"I don't have a problem."

"Right well cheer up then."

"Fine."

They have been arguing more and more lately. Little things about Remus just get on Sirius's nerves. Sirius's attitude grates on Remus. And yet…. it's less like an argument somehow. Somehow it's more like a dance.

**5****th**** Year **

Over the summer Sirius Black has managed to blag himself a girlfriend. Her name is Bethany, and she is one of those girls who seems entirely composed out of lightness and sweetness. She is beautiful in exactly the same way Remus Lupin isn't.

Remus can't stand her. He can't stand her smile, her thoughtful comments, her lack of imagination, her lack of impulsiveness. He can't stand the way she is too afraid to make a stand. He hates her strawberry blond curls and little white teeth. He hates her soft Oxfordshire accent, and the lisping lilting tones of her voice. Remus spends a great deal of time thinking of reasons to hate her, and one afternoon he finally realises why.

Sirius is sat with Bethany in the library, laughing at something Remus can't hear. He hates it when people do that, it always seems like they are laughing at him. He feels his blood boil slightly, and fights the impulse to leave.

Remus is writing an essay on magical creatures, but keeps getting his sentences muddled up. There is a terrible feeling at the back of his mind, something he has felt before but just can't place. He glances down at his work and realises he has just been writing the same word over and over again. Beast. The scars on his arms glare out to him and he feels disgusting. Really disgusting and revolting and unpleasant, and everything that Bethany, lovely, perfect Bethany, just isn't. She has everything that he hasn't got. She has everything that he wants.

Hang on one minute.

She has everything that he wants.

Everything.

Shit.

* * *

Sirius kicks a pile of Autumnal leaves. They fly up into the breeze and scatter like paper planes. Today is the day he dumps Bethany.

It's not that he doesn't enjoy spending time with her, and it's not that he doesn't like her. It's just that whenever she touches him it feels wrong. It's felt wrong right from the start.

Sometimes Sirius gets lonely. Now and then he needs the feel of human contact and the sight of a smile meant only for him. He doesn't think this makes him a bad person.

What makes him a bad person is the fact that he can't stop thinking about Remus. . .

* * *

"The problem," Sirius is explaining to Suze one rainy Thursday evening in the Herbology Greenhouse, "isn't that I'm male."

"No" Suze agrees, dunking a biscuit into her tea, and licking off the chocolate. "I don't suppose that would be the problem."

"He's always been so liberal, you know, and sort of… open minded."

"Yeah, I think he's very much in the train of thought where you consider love to be an occurrence between two people, regardless of gender."

"Definitely." He looks at his watch. "Oh, I better be off, late for a pranking session" Suze grins.

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that. See you next week. Oh- and Sirius?"

"Yeah."

"Excellent essay on Tracheids. Top notch."

* * *

It's Christmas, and James Potter is hard at work. He's had an idea. A reckless, dangerous and very brilliant idea. Like all of James's ideas it is one that just seemed to fly at him out of nowhere and hit him square in the face. What if they could join Remus on his monthly outings? What if they could, so to speak, Run With The Wolves?

Some intense solitary research was required. It wasn't going to be easy. Unregistered Animagi, if caught, were sometimes sent to Azkaban. James shudders at the very thought.

Quite apart from the Animagi idea, James has another scheme on his hands. Operation "Get Evans". Ever since the conversation with Remus in the Library, Lily Evans has been rather hostile towards James. He convinces himself this is due to severe unresolved sexual tension.

Another student suffering from unresolved sexual tension is Sirius Black.

Sirius has never really _wanted_ anything before. There is a difference, he considers, between wanting something and _wanting _it so much his teeth hurt, his stomach is in knots and he aches for it. His family have money and he has brains, but he has never wanted any of it, not really, if truth were to be told.

Sirius isn't gay, he decides. It's just Remus. The sight of the boy makes his chest jolt unpleasantly and a grin spread goofily over his face. A five minute chat with Remus can brighten his whole day, and if he ever sees his friend looking glum he feels he would do anything to see him smile again.

The worse of all the symptoms, in Sirius's opinion, is the jealously. Rabid, it is, and oh how painful! A glance of Remus chatting with a girl and he wants to hurt someone. Not her, and definitely not him, but _someone, _or something.

Christmas is particularly bad. Mistletoe and girls are _everywhere_. Sirius spends most of his time trying very hard not to think about it.

6th year

They have only bloody done it! James cracked it last Wednesday, in an inspired moment of genius. And here they are now, about to transform.

"What if I'm a goat?" Worries Peter. "I mean, I could handle being anything, like _anything_…except a goat."

"You aren't going to be a goat." Says Sirius reassuringly, and turning to James says under his breath: "I will slip you 3 galleons if you find a way to make him a goat."

"I heard that." Peter shouts.

James takes hold of Sirius's hand who takes Peter's.

"Now concentrate." He says. "Remember what I told you."

Sirius tries to concentrate. This is surprisingly hard, as there are other things on his mind. Then Peter lets out an "Oh!" and Sirius opens his eyes. Peter is not a goat. He's a rat. Sirius howls with laughter, until James lets go of his hand. His face pales and elongates, his back stretches and then there is this stag, just standing there in the shack. Sirius suddenly doesn't find this funny anymore.

"Sirius." A voice comes from the doorway. "Sirius, what the hell is going on?"

"Remus! We…" he tries to think of something to say. "We were going to tell you."

"_What _were you going to tell me, Sirius?"

The look on his face is something that in future Sirius tries very hard not to think about.

* * *

Sirius has a moment of madness.

This moment of madness occurs one sunny afternoon down by the lake. James and Peter are currently serving a week's worth of lunchtime detentions for turning Snape's hair a violent (and permanent) shade of pink. It would have been a month of detentions but Dumbledore was quite impressed with James's spell.

Sirius is messing around, he transforms and attempts to annoy Remus. Remus does his best to look annoyed. He pats the shiny black dog on his head, and then proceeds to stroke him gently. If Sirius was a cat, he would have purred. As it is, he just whines and wags his tail, rolling over. Remus rubs his belly, eyes fixed on the book in his hands. And then… one minute Remus's hands are tangled in dog fur…and the next they are touching human skin.

"Sirius!" Remus turns purple and pulls his hands away as if they were scalded.

"S-Sorry!" Sirius stutters, pulling his trousers on.

"A warning would be nice." Says Remus, who is finding it hard to breathe.

"I…It was an accident. I didn't mean too."

"Right." And then there is a pause, filled with the sound of their breathing and the memory of the contact, and Remus's hand is still burning from it and if he just reaches out now he could touch Sirius again, and surely Sirius knows, surely he knows…

"I have to go." Says Sirius.

He walks away, his heart pounding. For some reason tears blur his eyes, which he refuses to let fall. He has never wanted something, so didn't know how it felt to not be able to have it. It hurts. A dull, repetitive ache like a toothache. All his thoughts, all his plans are tied up in one person. He wants them back.

Sirius half-hopes Remus will chase after him.

* * *

James is watching Lily Evans. She really is beautiful. Little imperfections don't take away from this, they just attract him more because they are a part of her and she is flawless. He knows the way she stands, one hand on hip, one arm swinging. He knows her expressions, not just her smile, but all of them. He loves every single of them. Everything Lily touches turns to gold.

James shakes his head. Why on Earth is he thinking like a love-struck _woman_?

**7****th**** Year**

There is something in the air this spring. It could just be nerves for the looming exams, but James thinks it's something more. He can feel the end of an era coming.

James holds this feeling directly accountable for his behaviour that afternoon.

Lunch has just drawn to a close, and students are milling out from the great hall. James is with Sirius, Remus and Peter, and is chatting animatedly about the new Gryffindor quidditch team line up. He isn't paying attention to where he's going and suddenly finds himself crashing into girl with fiery red hair.

"Oi, Potter! Watch where you're going!" Snaps Lily. James just stares at her.

"What's wrong with you? Have you lost the power of speech or something?" She says indignantly.

James grabs her hand.

"Come with me."

"You've lost it."

"Please." He says quietly, aware that everyone is now watching the two of them.

"Fine." She hisses.

He leads Lily out of the great hall and through the entrance into the courtyard. When James stops walking she angrily shakes off his hand and glares at him.

"This better be good, Potter."

"I've got to tell you something."

"Go on then Potter I haven't got all day"

He takes a deep breath. It's now or never.

"I…. I like you." James says, rather pathetically.

"You _like _me?" Lily repeats, confused.

"Yeah. Look I know I say it all the time, but I just wanted you to know… because I _really _mean it, you see? I _like_ you. I massively like you. I like the way you laugh, I like the way you play quidditch, I like the way you always get top marks in class."

He has gone rather red.

"The thing is I ….I more than like you. I think…I think that I could be falling in love with you." He pauses

"There I've said it. Now curse me, or hit me or…._say _something."

Lily says nothing for a second. Then she slaps James around the face.

"That's for being a knob." She says, then proceeds to kiss him.

* * *

It's Friday evening, and the last week of term. Sirius is sat with Remus at the top of the astronomy tower, having a fag.

"Seems weird to think next week we'll be leaving this place, doesn't it?" Remus muses.

"Seems weird to think we might never see each other again.." Ponders Sirius. Remus looks at him.

"Give me a cig, Sirius."

"You don't smoke."

"I think I need it."

Sirius hands him the packet and takes another out for himself. He takes his lighter and beckons Remus in closer. He lights the cigarettes and tries not to think about the proximity of his friend.

Remus coughs slightly from the smoke and Sirius feels like he's going to burst.

"I don't want to leave yet." He says suddenly. Remus turns to look at him.

"I thought you couldn't wait to get out of this place?"

"It's not that. I'm hardly going to miss bloody transfiguration, am I?" Sirius says dryly.

"Well, what _are_ you going to miss?"

"You know…" Sirius looks uncomfortable " The pranks. The laughs. Hexing Snape. James, Peter… and you. I'll miss _you_." He suddenly realises he's probably said too much and feels his face heat up.

"I'll miss it too, Sirius." Remus says, and adds very quietly. " I'll miss _you, _too."

* * *

It's the night before the last day of term, and Gryffindor are throwing a party in the common room. James and Sirius have managed to smuggle in some potent firewhiskey they bought off a suspect looking hag in Hogsmede. One Galleon for half a litre.

James is having a drink off with a 6th year. The 6th year is winning heads down as James is currently in some stage of unconsciousness. Lily gives him a little kick and he snorts, indicting he is still living.

Remus is sat by the fire, legs curled up to his head, just gazing into the flames.

"You are a right party-animal tonight mate." Says Sirius's voice from behind him.

"Thanks." Remus replies. "I'm not really up for celebrating if you must know."

"Me neither. Fancy trekking it to the dorms and getting wankered by ourselves?"

"I'm up for that" Sighs Remus.

* * *

Remus and Sirius are sitting together, legs stretched out in front of them, on Sirius's bed. Remus takes another swig of Firewhisky.

"That is vile." He says, making a face.

"Yeah, it is a bit…" Sirius agrees. He looks at his knees. "Moony?"

"Yeah?"

"We are going to see each other again, aren't we?" Says Sirius. He tries to make it sound casual but it comes out a bit too fast and much too desperate for his liking.

Remus pulls himself up and turns to his friend.

"Of course we are. Don't be a dick."

They grin.

And it's possibly the alcohol and it's definitely the fact it's the last night, but Remus suddenly realises that even though it's not the end of the road, it's now or never.

"I have to tell you something." He mumbles. "And I don't want you to hate me for it."

"Ok." Sirius says.

"Fuck." Remus moans, tugging at his hair. "Well… this is a lot harder then it is in movies."

"What's going on?"

"You know…you know you once told me I was too uptight?"

"Yes, and you said you would prove me wrong. You never did, you know." Sirius laughs.

"Well, this is me doing it. This is me proving you wrong."

And he kisses him. He just does it. All those years of thinking about it and wanting it and needing it and now he's doing it. He can taste Sirius, and it's hot and it's wet and they are closer then they have ever been before.

Sirius is vaguely aware that he's making little yelpy noises but can't stop them. He can feel Remus's tongue run across his bottom lip, and he loves it.

He loves Remus.

Sirius reciprocates the kiss with all his might. It doesn't matter that there's spit and noses and teeth. All he wants is Remus.

They break for air and pant for a while. Awkwardly avoiding each other's eyes.

"Sorry." Remus says, very quietly.

"Don't be sorry." Sirius breathes. "I…really liked it."

"I really like _you."_ Says Remus, and immediately wishes he hadn't. Until he sees the look on Sirius's face.

"I really like you too, mate."

They grin stupidly at each other. Neither of them want to make the first move but they both need to close this gap. They both rush forward and are suddenly together and it's perfect. It makes perfect sense.

* * *

Thanks for reading

Please Review if you've got time. :)


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